Monday, February 16, 2009

A normal uupdate of life...

After the CNY break, I again back in Penang... Celebrated my birthday with friends... A really happy one... Thanks for the (almost) surprise... Haha had a great night... Then, lead on normal life routine of lectures, practicals, swimming, bla-bla-bla...
And here comes Valentine's day... Close friends were busy preparing their Valentine's present... Went to Queensbay for dunno how many times a week... Was expecting a quiet and lonely weekend for myself... Planned to study and finish my lab report and stuff, then here comes the invitations... Fully booked on Valentine's day... Noon went out with YewJin and the new couple to gurney... Took the Valentine's Package at Redbox Gurney and enjoy my all time favorite ~ singing!! Then continue to Queensbay and BZ joined us for a short walk... Indulged my long lost favorite Chocolate Indulgence at Secret Recipe~ Yummilicious... Then WS came and we went to look for a wedding gift for our SHE project... Next, table for 2 at T.G.I.Friday Queensbay... and lastly, end the day with Ong Bak 2 at Golden Screen Cinema QBM. Got a box full of chocolate and candy from WS, and a bracelet from YJ...

I know it's abit late... But still....
~Happy Valentine's Day~
To all my readers, my friends,
and of course, yewjin and winsoon...
-mk-

真的不懂吗?

不知何时,我爱上了用中文写部落格。。。
因为可以很感性,很明白,很诗意;
又或很抽象的写出某时某刻的心情。。。

那一夜,我失眠了。
在床上翻来覆去的我又写了一小段:

又是一个失眠的夜晚,
女孩打开了笔记型电脑,
只想把此刻的心情记录下来。。。

不知为何在这元宵之夜,
女孩好像特别特别地想他,
脑里不停地幻想着种种的放肆,
幻想着把自己一头栽进他怀里,
心里有股冲动如活火山似,
只差一触便会即时爆发!

女孩仰卧着,嘴里哼着抒情歌,
不知不觉思绪飘到了从前的他,
当时意识清楚知道已走到了尽头,
却贪婪地沉溺在他温柔的怀抱中,
好像中了毒一样的不可自拔!

从幸福洋溢的调情,
演变成泪湿的吻别,
只能苦笑一个无奈,
而再哀叹一个悲哀,
悠悠飘逸空气中的,
不过就是一缕讽刺 。

偶尔会回想这一路走来。。。
被逼放弃的可能,
死要面子的硬撑,
一时冲动的决定,
孤单寂寞的夜晚,
忐忑不安的心灵,
自甘堕落的活该,
若无其事的淌血,
左右为难的矛盾,
滔滔不绝的烦恼,
一言难尽的无奈,
还有种种的种种,


想了想,
再嘲笑自己的不知所谓,
到底在搞什么?
为什么人家都是那么简简单单地过,
而我非要把自己的人生弄得那么复杂?
一直坚持自己的执著,
到最后我会快乐吗?
真的能得到幸福吗?
让人伤心难过得我,
配吗?

我不懂。。。

我说我不懂,我真的不懂吗?
好像只是用来逃避的三个字。。。

有时人家用可爱来形容我,
但我觉得可笑,可悲,可恶,可怜,更为合适。。。

糟糕!自我厌恶的毛病好像变严重了。。。
一直交错在自恋与自厌之间,
快精神分裂了。。。

不写了。。。 拜拜

Sunday, February 1, 2009

回顾过去叹遗憾,
放望未来惧不安,
止步当下空惆怅,
进退两难站亦难。